99. ‘Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah’ and Creating and Supporting Mentoring Relationships to Empower Youth (with President and CEO, Jill Sundstrom)

'Big Brothers Big Sisters' began over 100 years ago as an alternative to the juvenile justice system when a group of adults realized they could help vulnerable kids by giving them connection and meaningful relationships. Now with over 230 chapters in the United States, they have many programs to help youth reach their full potential in a variety of ways.

On this episode I feature Jill Sundstrom, who is the President and CEO of 'Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah'. She shares some great stories and outcomes that show the impact this organization is having on the ‘bigs’ who volunteer with them and the ‘littles’ who they support. 

Listen to this episode to hear the many ways anyone can get involved in supporting the children and youth in your community. Or if you are part of a nonprofit, you might hear some great ideas for how you can continue to grow and evolve so you can not only help the people you serve, but give more opportunities for others to volunteer with your organization.

Links mentioned in this episode:

Big Brothers Big Sisters of America

Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah

Follow the podcast on social media:

Do Something More Instagram

Do Something More Facebook

Do Something More YouTube

Transcript

Melissa: This episode is featuring Big Brothers Big Sisters, and I'm talking to Jill Sundstrom, who is the president and CEO of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah. You might have heard of this organization.

They've been around for a little while.

But something that stood out to me in this interview is the ways that they have diversified over the years to increase their effectiveness, not only for those that they're serving, for the youth and children that they want to support,

but for the people who want to volunteer with their organization.

So whether it's adding site based mentoring that she talks about in this interview or operating donation centers to help raise funds for their organization,

there's just a lot of different ways that they have grown and evolved over the years. So I think even if you've heard of them before, you will learn something new in this interview or if you are in part of nonprofit yourself,

I think you might hear some great ideas for how you can continue to grow and evolve as well.

Welcome to the Do Something More podcast.

The show all about service, where we highlight the helpers who inspire us all to do something more.

If you're passionate about nonprofits or looking for simple ways to volunteer and give back to the causes that matter to you,

this is the podcast for you.

I'm your host, Melissa Draper.

Stick around and I'll show you all the many ways anyone can truly make a difference in our world today.

Welcome to another episode of the podcast. And today we are featuring a nonprofit that I hope many of you have heard of,

Big Brothers Big Sisters. And basically they encourage adults and in the communities that they work in to be mentors and friends in an organized and structured way with at risk kids in their community.

But I'm going to have our guest explain a little bit more about what they do and the impact that they have.

And so I want to welcome to the podcast the president and CEO of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah, Jill Sundstrom. Jill, welcome.

Jill: Hi. Thanks so much for having me.

Melissa: Melissa,

let's just start off with you doing a simple introduction of yourself, and then we'll get into the meat and potatoes of Big Brothers and Big Sisters and what they do.

Jill: Okay, awesome. My name is Jill Sundstrom. I've worked with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah for 24 years now,

longer than I haven't. It's been something that I kind of fell into and became a passion really quickly in my life.

I've had the opportunity to grow with the organization over time.

I love what we do. Our miss,

as Melissa said, is to create and Support one to one mentoring relationships that ignite the power and promise of youth. We know that all kids have potential and we're just here to help ignite that potential.

And our, our vision is that all youth achieve their full potential. So hoping we can do that through just one to one relationships.

Melissa: And I would love to just kind of get more into the details of that. Like what, what does that look like? Just walk us through a little bit how you set up those mentorships,

how people apply, how the kids come in and how you orchestrate all of that.

Jill: Yeah. So we have three separate programs, but all of them have very similar entry points.

Basically, kids come to us from referral. So whether a parent refers them or they know a family member or neighbor who has had a big,

they reach out. They can reach out online@bbbsu.org or via phone and they ask to enroll in the program.

And the enrollment looks like we do a little bit of training with the parents and the youth both on child safety and relationship development that's required before they're enrolled. And then we do a one to one interview with them and our staff go out to the home typically, or if it's in a school based program,

they do it at the school and they're interviewing both the youth and the parent or guardian or if it's at a school based program, someone within the school. To get a sense of why the youth might want to be involved,

we ask for all of our parties to make a minimum of one year commitment. So that includes the parents and the, and the youth making that one year your commitment.

During the interview process, we get a sense of what they're looking for, what goals they have and who they're looking for for their big or mentor.

We want to make sure everyone is placed in a comfortable relationship where everyone feels safe. So we take into account all parent preferences.

And obviously then once everyone's been through that interview process before we make a match, we call in advance. Our matching team spends a lot of time finding the best match and they call in advance.

They start with the par and propose a match to them without any identifying information, but making sure everyone's comfortable with what we're proposing at that point in time. And we do the same on the big side of things,

making sure everyone feels comfortable with what we're proposing. And then once that happens, our staff comes together, we do an in person match meeting with the parent, the child and the volunteer.

We help them kind of set up their first couple of activities while they're there. We Go over ground rules, expectations,

goals for the match.

Then from there, everyone has a case manager that they're following up with monthly after that to make sure everything's going well.

Like all relationships, these relationships hit bumps in the road as well. So we want to make sure that we have a staff person that people can check in with and make sure, you know, we can help navigate some of those challenges that may come about.

Melissa: Yeah, that's great. I just had a few questions I thought of as you explained that. So the criteria for the kids,

do they need to be in a certain at risk category?

Like, is there any criteria there? Or do you accept parents that come in and say, hey, I think this program would really benefit my child.

Jill: So a couple of things we need to make sure.

One,

that the youth want to be a part of the relationship, the mentoring relationship. It doesn't work if it's not something the kids want to do as well.

Melissa: Yeah, that makes sense.

Jill: Two, they need to be able to advocate for themselves via phone.

So they do have to have the ability to talk to their case manager at least once a month and advocate for themselves. So some kids just,

maybe they're, when they're super young, aren't able to do that or have those communication skills right up front and maybe we revisit at a later date. Or some kids,

you know, just aren't able to reach that level. And so we want to make sure that we can keep everyone safe.

And so that is important.

Most the kids in our program are coming from multiple areas of risk. So whether that's low income or other areas, it doesn't always.

It doesn't always look the same.

Melissa: Right, right, right.

Jill: So if they feel like they need and want to mentor, typically that's. That's the criteria.

Melissa: Yeah. And I love that you mentioned the work that goes into making a match because you're not just throwing names in a bucket and pulling one out or flipping through applications, that there is actually criteria.

And a lot of thought that goes into. Because I'm sure you want these to be successful. Right. Right from the go.

So what are some of the things that your team's looking at there as they go through that?

Jill: Yeah, so we're looking at a lot of things. When the volunteers do their interview, their interview is pretty in depth too, about their past. So we're looking for things like shared experiences that the youth and the BIG may have had when they were younger or shared goals.

Like if a youth has a certain goal for a career or future and a big has that in Their past. That's always a good fit.

We're also looking for those shared preferences. So sometimes things like religion are important to a family or a volunteer, and we're going to try to make a match based on that, but certainly shared values and things like that as well.

So making sure that we're,

again, creating safe, open spaces for both our Bigs and Littles right from the beginning.

Melissa: Yeah. And I love that you call those mentors Bigs and the kids Littles. That just. That's great.

Jill: Yeah.

Melissa: So I would love to hear. I'm sure you hear all kinds of stories and feedback,

but what. What are some experiences that you could share with us that your Bigs or your Littles have had that show you the good impact that you're having with this, with big brothers.

Big sisters.

Jill: Yeah. So one of the. One of my favorite stories is a Big brother and a little brother named Matt and Gabe. And they were matched when Gabe was just,

I think, nine years old, eight or nine years old. And then Gabe's family ran into some situations that just.

He had to move in with an aunt for a while,

and then just lots of different moves over time.

But Matt stayed with him throughout all of that. And one of the cool things is that Matt was able to be that constant while Gabe's life was constantly changing.

And over time, Gabe graduated from high school, and Matt was still matched with him during that graduation process.

Gabe went into the Navy,

finished up in the Navy, came back with his GI Bill,

went to school,

and now Gabe's getting his master's in social work.

And when you talk to Gabe about it, he talks about how much, you know, Matt just kind of helping him through with his aunt,

figuring out what could come next,

what his next steps looked like for him, how much influence that had. And then he's going into social work because of the experiences he had had in his life, both good and bad,

and wanting to make that difference. And I think that' just. It's just one of many I can talk to. I can speak to stories from former board members who went into law enforcement because their Big brother was in law enforcement or other former board members who went.

Also went into the Navy because it was a space they had seen their Big brother do or that could help them navigate. And then it led to big, great, amazing things for them over time.

So those are kind of some of the big stories. But one of the things I tell our Bigs as well to watch for is it's not always about that big, like, huge life change.

Sometimes it's about that skill that you teach your little that prevents them from making, you know, a choice or making a choice too early in life.

Sometimes it's just about getting through the next day.

One of my little sisters, I've been matched in the program three times over the last 24 years.

And one of my little sisters, she said to me one of her favorite activities was that we could go to the grocery store together because grocery shopping in her house was a stressful thing, whether it was because of budget or because there were, you know, five or six kids going to the grocery store.

When we would go to the grocery store together,

she could just take her time. We could talk about other things. We could, like,

have little life lessons and little moments.

And now she's 24 years old and she talks about how she still kind of builds out her grocery shopping list the way she and I did it, you know, when she was 11,

because it was just a moment that, you know, she was able to learn something from me and again, and maybe not life changing, but just something easy. And we always encourage people to do the things that you're already doing or explore the things you already want to explore.

This is a great opportunity for you to get to know your community, too. If you've always wanted to go on a certain hike, take your little with you.

If you've always wanted to go to a museum, take them with you. It's a great way for you both to explore community resources and see what's out there.

Melissa: Absolutely.

And I love that you emphasize there. You just don't know the small interactions that make a difference for those children. As you told that story about the grocery store, I just had to smile because I grew up in a big family.

And I have distinct memories of going grocery shopping with my mom. And it was just me and her, you know, it was just those. Those rare times where it was me and her, and that was.

It felt special.

And I remember that, and I remember those feelings. And yeah, something as simple as. As you said, grocery shopping or whatever it might be,

just leaves an impact and really helps those kids.

Jill: And I mean, one other thing I want to. I want to tell the flip side of both those stories, or those stories as well, is I've never met a big who hasn't said they got more out of the opportunity than their little did or they felt like they learned more.

And I think particularly in this world where sometimes we feel really divided from others,

being able to get to know someone who's living a different life than you or living in a different circumstance than you just provides so much value to you as well.

And understanding of what might be going on in the world and that type of proximity with someone that's slightly different than you can be so valuable to your learning and your understanding of the world as well.

Melissa: Right. Without question. And in the process, you're trying to build a good, solid relationship with them too. And that that's a benefit for everyone.

Jill: Yeah.

Melissa: And I love that you mentioned there in Matt and Gabe's story that that relationship was a long time.

Jill: Yeah. They're still connected.

Melissa: I love that. So you, you ask for that year commitment, but it seems most definitely there are examples of a really longstanding life long relationship that's built.

Jill: Absolutely. And our average match length just even formally within the program is three years.

So it seems like a really big commitment when we're asking for a year. But on average, most people are staying connected even within like the very formal bounds of our program for three years.

Melissa: That's great.

Well, something else I noticed to go along with those good stories on your website was some of the good outcomes that you see just in general, statistics wise, for the kids involved.

Do you mind sharing some of those or in general just going over some of those things like,

you know, graduation rates was just one I saw that was improved, but I. There were so many on there, I was impressed with that.

Jill: Yeah. So we do one of the things about Big Brothers, Big Sisters and the model is that it is research based and we do track outcomes. And so we found over time,

even just in our own program here in Utah over the last five years, 100% of the kids that were matched in our program when they graduated high school did graduate from high school.

And 89% of them stayed strong in their own educational expectations. As to what comes next,

one of the.

Melissa: That's huge.

Jill: Yeah. Yeah.

And I think one of the coolest statistics is that 23% of the kids in our program here in Utah saw a meaningful decrease in their depressive symptoms after being matched for one year.

And we know that that's an issue here in the state of Utah and around the nation as far as,

you know, suicide being the number two reason that adolescents die in the state of Utah. And so we know that seeing those meaningful decreases is really important. And then another 90% of those kids reported ongoing or improved emotional regulation, which I think about, even for myself, for my teenagers,

how important it is to learn to,

to regulate your emotions and how much that affects so many other aspects of your life.

So those are some really cool ones. But one thing I wanted to point out, we just recently had a long term study where some researchers from Harvard looked at kids that were matched in the 90s compared to kids that did not end up getting matched in the 90s.

And they used Department of Treasury data to kind of look at what the difference was between those youth that were matched versus those that weren't.

And the kids that were matched with a big. Were 20% more likely to go to college than their peers.

They had increased earnings of 15% between the ages of 20 and 25.

And those increased earnings led to economic impact within their community as well.

Meaning that their mentorship was paid for itself within seven years just in increased tax revenue in that area.

And so really, it's not just great stories, it's great data. We know that investing in kids in this way really pays off long term.

Melissa: Right. And as a parent of three teenagers myself right now.

Jill: Yeah.

Melissa: And then plus my little. That's eight.

But especially I see in those teenage years,

I, I do my best. We have a good supportive home and relationships.

But those other good positive adult relationships with my children I so appreciate because they make a difference.

Yeah. And I think that is true for every child.

Jill: I agree. And the research tells us that. Right. Like it's one of the best indicators of strong mental health is having an adult outside of your parents that believes in you.

So.

Melissa: Right.

So I, I love that. Big brothers, big sisters. Basically your goal is to just take all of that, all of those things that we know and provide it in a more structured way that makes it possible for.

For every kid to have that experience.

Jill: Absolutely.

Melissa: And I noticed you mentioned this. Some of your programs are more community based, but you have site based programs too, where you actually go to the school so your mentors can just go and show up at the school.

Jill: Yes.

Melissa: That relationship. Is that right?

Jill: Yeah. So for mentors or volunteers that are looking for something a little more structured because it can be a little overwhelming to start. Just like going to someone's house and picking them up.

Melissa: Yeah. A little intimidating. Like, what am I supposed to do? Yeah.

Jill: So we do have site based programming where we're meeting at a certain school or location at the same time every week and our staff are kind of planning the activities for you most of the time.

So that's kind of our site based mentoring. And one of our newer programs, I shouldn't keep calling it new, it's about 10 years old,

is Mentor 2.0.

And you're matched with a high school student and our staff are in their classroom once a week teaching a lesson on what comes next, what comes after high school or resilience or grit.

And then they write you a message on the platform about what they learned. You have that week to write back to your mentee and let them know you know, your thoughts on what they learned and kind of talk about their week.

And then once a month, you come to the school and we host a big dinner party for you all.

And you have two hours to kind of cement those learnings, get to know each other. But it's really a way that people that aren't sure they can commit to,

you know, four to six hours a month. You can commit two hours a month. It's a scheduled time.

It's scheduled out for the school year, so you know what day you're going to the schools. And then your other time is really, you know, as you have time throughout the week to respond to the message.

So I think it's a great way to kind of get involved. If you've ever thought about mentoring as Mentor 2.0.

Melissa: Yeah, you've definitely thought of every stage or possibility or what people have to give or personality there. There really seems like there's definitely opportunities for every part of that for anyone that's thinking of wanting to volunteer.

Jill: Yeah, for sure. We try to try to make it work for everyone.

Melissa: Well, I just wanted to touch really quick, too, that you. I noticed you have a donation center.

We do. I was impressed that it seems a big part of your revenue even comes from that.

Jill: Yeah.

Melissa: So I think for other non profits, that might be something to consider. But do you want to just touch on that for a little bit?

Jill: But yeah. One of the things we do pride ourselves on is having that kind of diverse source of revenue because it can be a challenge, especially in times like now when revenue sources get tight.

So we have a separate 501C3. It's called Big Brothers, Big Sisters of Utah donation center. And you may have seen bins around the community or postcards in your mail saying, hey, we'll be in your neighborhood.

Schedule a pickup. And we partner with Savers thrift stores,

and we deliver all that clothing to them.

They pay us for those clothes. And then the resources that come from that help to support our mentoring programs. So they're about 30% of our revenue each year comes from this social enterprise that, you know, someone was smart enough in the mid-90s to take advantage of.

And we've been able to grow over time.

Melissa: So that's another way I can support Big Brothers Big Sisters if you're not ready to necessarily be a volunteer for sure.

Jill: And we have events throughout the year too. Like if you want to just kind of get a sense of what's going on.

There's you know, golf for kids sake or bowl for kids sake or big night out where you can kind of just join us for a one time event,

it's fundraising event and hear more about our programs and enjoy yourself that day too.

Melissa: Yeah, I'll, I'll make sure to put a link to all of those in our show notes so people can check them out. Yeah,

well, Jill, I always love to near the end of my podcast episodes give general advice and encouragement because we do have listeners from all over listening for a variety of reasons.

And so what as you think about it, what just kind of general advice would you give for those wanting to mentor or support at risk kids in their own communities or how they can find the Big Brothers Big Sisters if that's the way they want to go.

What general advice do you have?

Jill: Yeah, well, if you wanna find the Big Brothers Big Sisters bbbs.org There's over 230 chapters across the nation,

so there's probably one near you.

But if you're looking to just mentor in general or if you're mentoring through Big Brothers Big Sisters, I think couple pieces of advice. I have one, they're just like any other relationship.

So there's gonna be ups and downs.

These kids may have had adults not be present for them or leave.

So they might test you just like any k.

So just be patient. Know even though sometimes I'm far more nervous than a kid in a situation,

remembering that, you know, they might just be testing me if they're not chatting today or if they're not super open for a couple of times, just showing up matters. So I think that's my very first piece of advice is showing up no matter how hard they push matters.

And then the second thing is just, you know, remembering no matter where you're volunteering or remembering that the rules and the boundaries are there for a reason.

Right. There's lots of reasons that they've been put in place. And so if they ask you not to go to a movie every week for five weeks in a row, it's because you're setting an expectation and then people might be disappointed.

So just remember that there's always reasons. And if you don't understand them, ask, ask someone why they're there and it probably has some good, good value to it.

Melissa: Right. They're there to help your relationship.

Jill: Yes, exactly. Exactly.

Melissa: That's all great. Good advice.

And I think there are a lot of ways that people do have an interest either within their church community,

school community,

their cities,

and supporting the kids in our communities and giving them those good interactions and relationships. So I love hearing about the good work you're doing.

Jill: Yeah, well, thanks, Melissa. We really appreciate the opportunity to share more about it, so thanks for having us.

Melissa: Yes, absolutely. Well, do you want to just share quick where anyone listening can find Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah, specifically on the Internet and social media?

Jill: Yeah. So you can find our website@bbbsu.org and then you can find us on social media, all the major platforms,

BBSUtah,

and follow us there and kind of learn more about what's going on. So.

Melissa: Sounds good. Any further stories or thoughts you wanna share?

Jill: I'll just quickly say, you know, Big Brothers Big Sisters was born over a hundred years ago as an alternative to the juvenile justice system. There was kind of a court clerk that kept seeing the same boys come through his system in 1904,

and he went to his men's club at the time and said, you know, we can do better. Like, they don't need to go.

These boys don't need to be in the juvenile justice system. They just need someone to hang out with them and show them a better way.

And I think over the years, it's kind of grown and changed as times has needed it to. But really, I think that's our roots. Right? We can do better for kids.

And so we're just trying to be there for kids that need us.

Melissa: Absolutely. That connection will always have more effect than just stringing out the consequences. I think connection really is where it's at, so.

Well, thank you so much, Jill. It's been a pleasure to talk with you on the podcast today and learn more about the good work you do with Big Brothers Big Sisters.

Jill: Thank you, Melissa. I appreciate it.

Melissa: That was my interview with Jill Sundstrom with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Utah.

And again, two things that stood out to me.

First is how they have diversified in their organization to not only support the many youth in different ways and the variety of ways that they can support them,

but number two, to give opportunities for people to volunteer in the different ways that might fit better with their schedule or their lifestyle or where they're at.

And I think that is a great mark of any organization to be evolving and changing and growing in those ways that support the people you are serving and those that want to volunteer and help you in the good work you're doing as well.

And the second thing that stood out to me was what she shared a couple times in that interview, that these relationships are like any relationships, and that's such a good thing to remember, especially when you're volunteering with children and youth.

But really when you're working and wanting to help anyone to remember that all relationships have their ups and downs and that what matters is showing up,

having that connection and continuing to do the good work and to show up in that good work and in building those relationships. So I thought that was a great reminder for really anyone that's wanting to find connection and do good work and serve the people in their community.

So again, I will leave links in the show notes so that you can learn more about Big Brothers, Big Sisters here in Utah or the national organization as well,

or get involved if that is something that interests you.

And as a friendly reminder, I would like to invite you to please leave a review for this podcast or give us a good five star rating or follow the podcast wherever you listen to your podcast that helps it reach more people and more audiences that are looking to listen to this kind of content.

And as always this week, I hope that you can find a way to do something, something more to help lift, inspire or make a difference.